Lost In A Nightmare
by adii1201
Summary: Takes place at season 6; Sad one shot; Tom facing one hard decision and Lynette faces a battle


_Lost In A Nightmare_

"_She was 7 months pregnant and we were so excited about this. I know at first she didn't want these babies but she got used to the idea eventually and she even wanted them and was thrilled. _

_It was a Sunday night. We had such a quiet day and all we did was just rest. Together. She was so tired all day but we didn't pay any special attention to it. We never thought anything could happen and everything was going so well. We even visited the doctor the week before and she was so happy to see them. We decided we don't want to know the sex until they're born._

_I remember it all so clearly and the memories linger in my head._

_We went to sleep and she was in my arms, just like always. But then I woke up in the middle of the night and she was gone. I heard her throwing up in the bathroom and I immediately jumped out of bed. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. She was so pale and was throwing up blood. She looked at me, and she was so helpless, so worried. I remember that the first thing I thought of was if she's going to be ok but as I looked at her I knew the only thing she thinks of is the babies._

_The ambulance got us to the hospital fast, though not fast enough. She was taken away from me before I even got the chance to kiss her and reassure her. I was standing there, in the hall, and couldn't move. I was afraid my next breath would be without her._

"_Mr. Scavo"__ I remember her doctor calling me. I knew just by the expression on his face he had bad news but I had to hear them. I needed to know what's going on with her._

"_Your wife suffers from bleeding in her neck. She has cancer again"__ I could feel the floor moving beneath me as I heard those words. _

"_Their lives are in danger. You have to choose- it's her or the babies, we won't be able to save them all."_

_I couldn't believe what was happening. I have to choose between my wife and my babies. My heart screamed I must choose her, knowing I really can't live without her but my head reminded me of her look just hours ago and I knew that if she was the one who needed to choose she would've chosen the babies without even blinking._

"_Mr. Scavo, I know it's a tough call but you have to decide fast or we'll lose them all"_

"_Can't you try and save them both? Please"__ I begged._

"_I'm sorry but if we save her we have to do the surgery to stop the bleeding and get the tumor out and the babies won't survive it and if we save them she won't survive it. We must move fast because she's losing a lot of blood."_

"_Is she going to die from the cancer?"__ I finally asked._

"_No, we'll get most of the tumor out and she'll need chemo but she won't die from it."_

"_Save her"__ I managed to say and I knew she'd hate me for the rest of her life for it. I just couldn't let go of her. Not now, not yet. Not like this._

_The doctor disappeared into the OR and I was left there to deal with the choice I just made. I decided my twins won't live. I took their chance of living. But I had to, Lynette is my other half, she's my life, I couldn't even think about living without her when I made this choice._

_I remember sitting near her bed all day, waiting for her to wake up. When she opened her eyes I could tell she wants answers, even though she knew. I had to tell her everything, I couldn't lie to her._

"_Lynnie, I know you'll hate me but I had to choose and I chose you. I'm not going to say I'm sorry because I'm not. I can't live without you."_

"_Tom…"__ She cried out loud. I wanted to hold her, to tell her I love her but I didn't know if she wanted me to._

_She took a moment to calm down and then she said__ "I would've given my life for them and for you but I get why you chose me. I get it because I get the way you love me only because I love you just as much. I love these babies and I can't__believe I lost them but I'm not mad at you. It's not your fault."_

_At that moment I knew I made the right choice and I knew why I'm married to her and not to someone else. And we both knew just then that we're going to go through so many things together, and this might be the hardest of all, but we have each other and we'll get through it._

_She was about to ask me to hold her but she didn't have to. I sat in bed next to her and took her in my arms. She cried for hours about her lost babies, about the battle she was facing now. And I just held her tightly and promised her we're going to be fine._

"_I love you"__ were the last words she said to me before falling asleep in my arms. _

"_I love you too"__ I whispered back and kissed her forehead. She's still here with me, I thought._

_I'm writing this now, about 6 months after that horrible night. She's lying next to me in bed, she just had chemo and she's feeling really bad. She's my trouper, she's fighting the cancer and the fact she lost her babies because of it. She's so strong yet so fragile. And I wish I could've saved them all, but she's the love of my life and I promised her, I'll save her, no matter what. _

_I also realized something the last few months, _**_Impossible means nothing to us_**_."_


End file.
